The Ending comes first

I look back and realize how much I learned from my mother. Not in what she said, but how she lived her life. She always forged ahead. Nothing could stop her - well, except that stupid brain tumor - but her attitude was always one of victory and strength, and faith in God. I am thankful for the cherished memories that that she left for me.  While my dad was a man of quiet strength and latin pride, my mother was a woman of action and humble spirit.  Perhaps thats what held the marriage together, they needed each others gifts to balance them out. Mom and dad have both achieved their goal of seeing their Heavenly Father, while I have been left here to contemplate life, and continue their quest of life. 

 

My daddy died January 25, 2001 after living much longer than any doctor imagined with a lifetime of heart disease. I say it was the garlic and chilies that kept him going.  

Seven months later, mom starting getting headaches and strange seizures.  It took almost 2 full months to get her correctly diagnosed.  We finally got her in for an MRI two days before Thanksgiving.  Thanksgiving Day, I received a phone call to bring her in the next day for another scan, as there was definitely "something there".  It was a tumor -  called a glioblastoma.   I had no idea that meant brain cancer.  My mama died May 14, 2002.  

Three years later, my brother Steve, and the love of his life, Judy, went on an Alaskan cruise. Steve was so happy as it was his dream to take this cruise, and to be with Judy was just the epitome of his happiness.  Seven days into the 10 day cruise, I received a phone call from my little brother.  Steve had a heart attack.  Steve died on the cruise, May 24, 2005. 

These three deaths in those 4 short years changed me, changed my life.  It seems I have so much to say, but to whom?  and in what order?  Thoughts and memories flutter through my mind like confetti blowing in the wind. No order, no reason or rhyme, just scattered thoughts. Lessons learned, words spoken, disagreements, hugs, acts of love, tough times, fun times.  I think it's called a life, and I'm thinking I'd like to get some of these thoughts out of my head, and birth them into their own life.  Perhaps they will impact someone else and cause movement, growth, or maybe just thoughtful reflection. 

Well, I feel better already.  There you go then.